The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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