U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
