I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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