I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize