so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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