my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
