.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
