Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize