dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
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