Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize