Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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