The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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