I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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