Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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