careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
