$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I could have mohawked her pubes.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
