I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have fence marks all over my body
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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