then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
