The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
