Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
