Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
