i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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