Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Farmville is her only friend.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
