Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
