I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
