lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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