Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
