whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
