Sry I called you an 8
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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