That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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