I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
