Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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