I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
