Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
