Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
