This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
