In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
it's like iHOP with fire
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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