I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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