yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
