return my video game
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
