Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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