Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
