bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
