Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
