I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
