hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
