Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize
