I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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