im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Randomize
