In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I am available for nakedness
Randomize